Why dirty your own damn clothes when you can pay a fancy brand some serious $$$ to do it for you, permanently?
While some people are still struggling to come to terms with distressed ripped jeans, say hello to the latest abomination in the name of 'fashion' - fake mud denim. Yes, just how the name suggests, the jeans have nasty mud splats all over it, making it appear as if you either slipped on a muddy road or you just don't have a concept of washing your clothes, ever. So, if you are somebody who likes to buy everything weird and 'unique' and have some serious money to spare, you can now own a pair of jeans which will surely turn some heads. A lot of them actually...
As much as I wish this was an April Fool's prank, it isn't. In fact, people are so in love with the idea that most of the sizes of the jeans are already OUT OF STOCK. Sold by Nordstrom, the fake mud jeans is apparently supposed to give you a 'badass' look, "Heavily distressed medium-blue denim jeans in a comfortable straight-leg fit embody rugged, Americana workwear that's seen some hard-working action with a crackled, caked-on muddy coating that shows you're not afraid to get down and dirty."
"Who even came up with this?" A luxury brand called PRPS. "PRPS is a luxury denim brand launched in 2002 by founder and creative director Donwan Harrell, whose philosophy is that authenticity is priority number one. The brand is renowned for its immaculate attention to detail and aspires to deliver perfect jeans, tees and more to the most discerning denim enthusiast. PRPS uses Japanese and Zimbabwean cotton and expert construction to create the finest products possible." Um. What's the definition of 'luxury' again?
Fancy yourself this luxurious piece of clothing? Head here and get yourself one for just, JUST, $425. And, if you're digging the whole fake-mud-denim thing a little too much, you'd be glad to know that the same seller is selling a jacket as well. "Deep caked-on, baked-in muddy smears give you permission to get down and dirty from rodeo to a grungy rock show in this cotton denim jacket that embodies rugged Americana, from its classic pockets to every crinkled and bleached accent," the jacket is currently out of stock. Check it out here, just in case.
The internet is in love with the fake mud apparels and if you are too, I'd suggest buying a cheap pair and then dragging it through mud yourself. Plus more than a fashion statement, the mud splats look like poop stains to me but to each their own. You can buy the dirty denim and complete the look with Janties, yet another denim innovation nobody asked for. Launched by a major luxury clothing brand called SSense, the very brief briefs are made of denim and can be worn inside or outside, depending upon your mood. According to the brand, this new creation will 'take your Canadian tuxedo to the next level.'
"Denim is a blank canvas. No longer merely known for its dependable twill-weave or for that matter, limited to legwear, denim’s new (and many) iterations are reframing the wardrobe staple beyond its heritage roots," the company introduced its weird denim collection and in case you have money pouring out of all your ends and you don't know where to spend it, you can make these jeans underwear yours for £235 GBP which is approximately $305 USD.
"Denim can be cheeky. And eye-catching. These “brief-style shorts” can be worn under or over pants, meaning they’re far more versatile than what you’d traditionally expect from a pair of briefs. Underwear that doesn’t need to stay “under there," SSense proudly describes the product. So, imagine going to Walmart on a beautiful Sunday morning and spotting someone wearing these with a dirty mud jacket. Sounds horrifying? That day isn't far.